What Grammar Can Teach Us about God

This weekend I spent time teaching an SAT prep class. One of the topics we cover is transitional words and phrases. Transitional words make the change from one idea to another. These words include words and phrases like the following

• In addition to
  
• Consequently
• Furthermore
• On the contrary
• Although
• For example
• And many, many more

However (that’ a transitional word too), this blog is not about grammar- it’s about God. Many times in life we go through change, but it seems like that assistance in transition is misse oing. These transitions can be natural or they can be forced. They can be the result of our choices or just part of the progression of life Yet whatever the reason we go through transitions, often times they are not easy. We are missing that segue between changes. If we were to write out our problems using sentences like the ones below it might look like this.

- I finished college and, consequently, I must now find a job.

- Even though my boyfriend broke up with me awhile ago, I am still having a hard time getting over it.

- To illustrate my frustration with things, I had to move on to another location.

And while these situations contain “transitions,” something is missing. I began to think about this. I life is full of transitional words and phrases. I find this to be especially true in my 20s- nothing seems to be consistent. I have struggled in so many ways to adjust to life that I lead now. For the past 5 years, I have experienced many “furthermores, consequentlys, howevers, and hences.” However, let me offer you a better grammatical fix for your life’s problems.

Instead of focusing on the transition, refocus on the conjunction. Let me explain what I mean. A conjunction is a word that connects two words, sentences, phrases or clauses. While transitions describe changes, conjunctions connect them. Conjunctions include words like “but, and, or, yet.” God is that conjunction we need in our life- He is what holds it all together. Imagine if your problems looked more like this:

- I finished college, yet I am confident that God is going to help me find a job.

- My boyfriend broke up with me, but God is holding my heart.

- I was extremely frustrated with things, but God opened the door for me in another way.

I have often heard the phrase “But God.” I must admit that if inserted into any sentence of problem in life it can change things. I am hurting, but God… I don’t know what to do, but God… I feel lonely, but God…

So next time you are going through a transition, focus on a conjunction, not the transition. Let Christ be the conjunction you need in all of life’s transitions.

Are you Committed?

Commitment is one of those words that strikes fear in some and excitement into others. To be honest, it depends on what that commitment may be to. For example, my students have no problem committing to their favorite activity, but have a harder time committing to their school work. Why is it that we are able to cling to some things, but then have apathy or disgust for others? Why can we not take that same level of dedication into one area of life as we do with another area?

Let’s be honest. I despise cleaning. I hate the dentist too. However, if I were to have to choose a daily dentist visit over having to clean my house every day, I’m not sure that it would be such an easy decision. You can call it laziness. You can call it apathy. You can call it whatever you would like, but the truth is, it is a lack of commitment. As someone who has excelled academically, I have an ability to dedicate my time and efforts to my school work. Yet, why am I so hesitant to do so when it comes to my house? I’m not sure that I have an answer, but I do have a problem. You see, what we are committed to is actually a reflection on our character, interests, and personality. If I invested a lot of time into sports, I might be an athlete. If I invested a lot of time into my homework, I might be a nerd. The fact that I do not invest a lot of time into taking care of my house makes me irresponsible. The truth is I need to take that same level of commitment I show in other areas of my life and apply it to cleaning. Not because everyone needs am immaculate house, but because this is a reflection on how I value myself. What I am committed to shows what I care about.

Why is this important?

The first reason is that a lack of commitment can have consequences. If you are not committed to your job, you will probably be fired. If you are not committed to a relationship, it will not be healthy. If you are not committed to your diet, you can become sick. A lack of commitment leads to consequences. This week I hurt someone I love a lot because I did not put any effort into showing them that I respected them with my actions. While the process I was committing to was not something I looked forward to, it was something that was important to the other person. It tortures me to know my lack of consistent dedication hurt someone else. And now I am in the midst of the consequences. While I’m not sure that the situation will ever be rectified, I am sure that I seriously look at consistent commitment in a new light and that process I was not dedicated to before will see the utmost level of dedication daily from now on.

More importantly, commitment is important in our relationship with Christ. Christ does not want us to just follow lightly in His footsteps- he wants committed disciples. I often see the quote, “God does not ask about our ability or our inability, but about our availability.” How often are you available for God? If we are committed, we are not only available, but God will make us able as well. Interestingly, two Bible verses that stick out to me are (and I wish I had known them before):

Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him to help you do it and he will. – Psalm 37:5

Commit your work to the Lord, then it will succeed. – Proverbs 16:3

Not only does Christ want us to be committed to Him, but the only way we can full succeed in other areas is to do so. I cannot overcome my disdain of cleaning without God’s help. He is able to make us succeed in any area that brings glory to His name. I used to think that cleaning was a trivial matter to God, but let’s face it- God cares about the details. One of the wisest people I know constantly reminds me, “If you are faithful in the little, then I can trust you to be faithful with more.” Cleaning, school work, our jobs, our relationships are commitments that God cares about because He cares about us.

So I ask you:

Are you committed to Christ?

Are you committed to the things He wants you to do?

Are you willing to handle to consequences if you are not committed?

If you're not ready, check out this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsSR4VrmsRY

Benched for the Season

I haven’t written in a long time. I would like to say that it’s because I’ve been busy. The opposite is true- this summer has been the least active time I have had in a really long time. Honestly, I would rather have said that I was busy. After all, it is the times that we are busy that we don’t have time to think about our problems, our insecurities, our anything. We can just move on with everything else and ignore the turmoil inside. We enjoy turmoil on the outside- the chaos of activities, drama, and entangled relationships. Yet we loathe the turmoil on the inside. When faced with two evils, we choose the lesser. That is, we sweep our problems under the rug, put on a happy face, and fill our lives with pretentious “busy-ness.”

However, God has truly broken me down this summer. Having closed the doors to many of my goals, God benched me for the season. (A fitting analogy as football season approaches). I felt like that athlete who has waited all year to play and then is sidelined by a major injury. When I look back at my heart in the beginning of the summer, I was angry and bitter. I have never been the one who cheered from the sidelines- my life was filled with me running around on the field (of life) getting goals. If you asked me earlier, I was the all-star of the team. Whether it was youth ministry, volunteering, or even my own relationship, I was playing the starring role. Then came that “injury.” You might have thought that God tripped me Himself. He quickly (and with much resistance from me) brought me to the bench and has been teaching what it means to play the background. And when you’re sitting on the bench of life, you start to think.

I can see now that God wanted me to sit there and do just that. Actually, He wanted me to sit there are pray and read His Word. Every time I tried to get off of the bench myself, He reminded me of my injury- my pride. I recently read this on a post by someone I know:

We usually ask God about what we should do or where we should go. But rarely do we ask God who we should become and what we need to work on in our character. I think it's because if we are always doing we never have to deal with who we are becoming and the result is a lot of work done but an empty soul and bad character.

This perfectly sums up where I have been. I was constantly asking God what I should do (remember that turmoil on the outside?) to avoid my turmoil on the inside. I think the biggest manifestation of this can be found in my relationship. I am often finding myself acting impulsively, emotionally, and frankly, irrationally. I quickly jump into the “game” without allowing myself to heal first. I don’t know how to “sit the bench” but God has been teaching me and I am so thankful for it.

When is the last time that you have sat the bench? When is the last time that you sat still long enough for God to show you His will?

During Teen Week, I taught on the topic, STAND: Still. Psalm 46:10 commands us to “Be still and know that I am God.” More importantly, we are to find our strength in rest just as that player finds healing in sitting out of the game.

Isaiah 30:15 says:

This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says:

“In repentance and rest is your salvation,
in quietness and trust is your strength,
but you would have none of it.

I am still learning and I feel like I am going to be on the bench for a long time, but it is worth it. Are you willing to take a seat and let God take control?

Let these lyrics from Lecrae’s “Background” remind you:

'Cause if I do this by myself, I'm scared that I'll succeed
And no longer trust in you, 'cause I only trust in me
And see, that's how you end up headed to destruction
Paving a road to nowhere, pour your life out for nothing
You pulled my card, I'm bluffing, You know what's in my hand
Me, I'm just going to trust you, You cause the dice to land
I'm in control of nothing, follow you at any cost
Some call it sovereign will, all I know is you the boss
Man, I'm so at ease, I'm so content
I'll play the background, like it's an instrument

I could play the background
I could play the background
Cause I know sometimes I get in the way
So won't You take the lead, lead, lead?

What Grade Would You Receive?

So I must admit that this is not the beginning of my writing. As I sat down tonight, I began to write out everything I was upset about. Actually, I was writing a list of expectations that I have in what makes a “good relationship.” However, as I was writing I became more and more convicted as to what God wants me to see in this situation. Funny how He does that, isn’t it? Here I was wanting more out of someone (who by the way gives so much to me each day) without looking in the mirror. I began to realize how often we make a checklist of expectations of other people and their failures and shortcomings. Imagine if we sat out and wrote a checklist of our own? (Now I know I struggle with being too hard on myself. I constantly push myself to perfection and can really over do it. My bigger problem, however, is trying to push everyone else to that point with me.) So as I began to write out my “concerns” I realized that I need to turn to some bigger things.

That is when God reminded me of one of the most read passages in the Scriptures- 1 Corinthians 13. We use this passage in those romantic moments- weddings, proposals, dates, etc. We as a society read those verse and think of how lovely they are. Yet, if we were to be honest, this is what love looks like by our standards.

Love gives me what I want when I want it. It tells me the words I want to hear. Love let’s me do what I want without getting jealous. It doesn’t require me to be humble, but rather helps boost my ego and self-esteem. Love is about making me happy. It doesn’t keep records of my wrongs when I want to be forgiven, but helps remind me of everything someone else does. Love doesn’t delight in evil, but it sure does give me what I selfishly want. Love protects me only when someone else is against me or when it is convenient. Love takes me on nice dates. Love holds my hand and hugs me. Love perseveres until I’m tired of it. Love is emotional , irrational, and inconvenient.
Yet, this is not what the Bible says at all .If I was looking for a checklist of what a relationship should be like, boy, did he slap me in the face with it.


____1. Love is patient.
____2. Love is kind.
____3. Love does not envy.
____4. Love does not boast.
____5. Love is not proud.
____6. It does not dishonor others.
____7. It is not self-seeking.
____8. It is not easily angered.
____9. It keeps no records of wrongs.
____10. Love does not delight in evil.
____11. Love rejoices in the truth.
____12. It always protects.
____13. It always trusts.
____14. It always hopes.
____15. It always perseveres.
____16. Love never fails.
As a teacher, if I were to look at this list as a rubric, I would certainly fail the assignment. And let's make it a little more realistic. If I put my name into each of those, I realize how much more I need Christ daily. "Bobbie is patient. Bobbie is kind..." and so on.

And honestly, I would much rather be a in a relationship that had those attributes than one that involves fancy dates, romantic cards, etc (not that those things shouldn’t be apprecitated.) And this list in not exhaustive. Scripture also tells us the following:

1. Love our enemies- Matthew 5:43-48
2. Love your neighbor as yourself. –Mark 12:31
3. Love God above all else- Mark 12:33, Luke 10:27
4. There is no greater love than to lay down our life for others- John 15:13
5. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love- 1 John 4:8
6. We love God because He first loved us. 1 John 4:19.

This is completely humbling. How can I try to hold someone responsible for expectations that I ignore? That doesn’t mean that we should accept certain things, but it does mean that we should first look at ourselves.

How are you doing on this checklist? God isn’t grading us because He wants us to be perfect- He gives us these standards because He wants what is best for us. And more importantly, He rightfully wants to bring glory to Himself. We glorify God when we reflect Him, not ourselves.

Does the way we LOVE others (our boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, brother/sister, coworker, friend, etc) reflect God? Does it meet the checklist? If not, ask Him to help you do so. That is my prayer for myself and for you as well. I am thankful not only for my relationships, but for the moments that remind me where my focus should be. This is my prayer for you and me.

And as I tell my students, don't worry about the grade someone else is receiving, worry about your own. What grade would you get?

Who is your favorite?

^{James 2: 1} My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism. ² Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in filthy old clothes also comes in. ³ If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, “Here’s a good seat for you,” but say to the poor man, “You stand there” or “Sit on the floor by my feet,” ⁴ have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?

⁵ Listen, my dear brothers and sisters: Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom he promised those who love him? ⁶ But you have dishonored the poor. Is it not the rich who are exploiting you? Are they not the ones who are dragging you into court? ⁷ Are they not the ones who are blaspheming the noble name of him to whom you belong?

⁸ If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, “Love your neighbor as yourself,”^[a] you are doing right. ⁹ But if you show favoritism, you sin and are convicted by the law as lawbreakers. ¹⁰ For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it. ¹¹ For he who said, “You shall not commit adultery,”^[b] also said, “You shall not murder.”^[c] If you do not commit adultery but do commit murder, you have become a lawbreaker.

One of the things that I love about my relationship is that I am constantly challenged to grow closer to God. The discussions we have challenge me not only to reflect on the wonders of God, but on the ways in my life in which I can improve. My boyfriend always cheers for the underdog- I am the perfectionist. God has used some recent discussions we have had(and the hard-hitting book of James) to really convict me in one area of my life- judging others.

My students always joke that they are my favorite, and I always tell them that the mark of a good teacher is the ability to make every student feel like my favorite student. While I’m half-joking (I can’t say I necessarily have a “favorite”) I started to realize how this principle needs to be applied to life in general. How much better would this world be if we treated every person as our favorite and had people respond to us in the same manner.? How would life be different if we gave everyone our best attention, our deepest respect, and our sincerest gratitude? I’m not advocating giving so much of ourselves that there is nothing left (I know what it can be like to be overwhelmed), but I am suggesting that we should love others as if they were the only person to be loved. After all, the amazing grace of God is that He loves each of us as His own. We are all His “favorite.” And while we might moan and groan when someone else seems to get the blessing we deserved, the Bible promises that God loves each of us so much that He sent His son to die for us. For you. For me.

As I was reading the book of James throughout the past week, the above passage on favoritism got me. I began to question how often I truly showed this type of favoritism. And while I may not necessarily judge those who are “poor” by the world’s standards, I know that I have shown preferential treatment to those who “appeal” to me more. The Bible calls this sin. What I might think is “surrounding myself with those who are like me,” is viewed as lawbreaking. That little comment I made about someone’s outfit, their hair, their mannerisms, etc. are viewed as all of the other sins. If I am not loving EVERY neighbor as myself, I fail to meet the mark. I could list a group of people who I do show love to and try to justify it to God, but would I want Him to return to me a list with my name on it of the people He chose not love? I could only imagine what it would be like if God said, “Well, Bobbie, I chose to love a lot of people, but I like them more than you. Sorry. They were “richer” than you.” Wow. If God wouldn't do that to me, how could I possible do that to others?

This is my lesson- to love others with the love of Christ so much that they believe they are not only your favorite, but God’s favorite too.